Taking the Long View, of Sorts

At some point, all healing injuries reach the point where physically, it's tough to discern if the body is actually completely healed or if the pain has subsided, while the actual healing needs more time to continue. Many times, the end of pain of discomfort truly marks just the halfway point of the healing. Like your body is saying, "OK, the fire is out, but it's still smoldering." 

I have no idea if running injuries are significantly different than other sports injuries in this respect, but I doubt it. At some point your body is OK enough to function without pain, but maybe not OK enough to function at running or jumping or absorbing tackles, etc. 

That point int he healing process is probably the riskiest, as it's very easy to give into the temptation of "well, it's been 3 days and it doesn't hurt. I'm sure 3 miles today will be OK. Just three miles..." I mean, maybe for some people this approach works out and they run 3 miles without any trouble and  that's that. I'd guess for more of us, myself included, this is merely our mind playing the role of The Empire at the Battle of Endor: lure us in with the appearance of normalcy, only to spring the trap ("It's a trap!") and bring the pain back about a mile into the run. 

That was my main concern following a frustrating week where my knee/upper leg hurt, but not terribly and felt fine after two days, only to then hurt again after I ran last Friday. Obviously, my mind had laid the trap and I'd fallen right into it, like Admiral Akbar and the rebel fleet. So, I resolved to shut the whole thing down for a full week, committing to not running again until this recent Saturday. My hope was that since the pain wasn't severe, I hadn't been quite stupid enough to create a much worse situation for myself right at the best running time of the year, and that a week of rest with some stretching and icing would provide the break needed to heal fitfully. 

Thankfully, I can report that at this point, that seems to be the case. After two short, easy runs this weekend of 3 miles apiece, the leg feels OK and I've had no pain during or after each run. I had just a touch of stiffness yesterday after the run, but I iced the spot and stretched my calf muscles out and used a foam roller that my wife got me for my anniversary (awesome!) and that helped tremendously. 

Today, I did the same route: a bit over 3 miles. I started at an easy pace but the leg felt really good so I gradually dropped my pace until I was around 8:30 or lower (my pace averaged 8:45 per mile for the 3+ miles) to test it a bit more. No issues at all, which was a huge relief. 

So, that discipline of not trying to deviate from the plan and jumping back into running mid-week seems to have paid off. I'm still going to my sports medicine doctor appointment on Tuesday for a couple reasons. First, I made it a week ago, so I might as well keep it. Second, I want to be sure, after describing the pain and the recovery, etc., that there's nothing else I should be doing or no other possible injury I should be considering. Better safe than sorry. 

Now, I've mapped out a gradual return to where I was before the injury, minus the foolish speedwork. Rest tomorrow (Monday), then 4 miles on Tuesday followed by rest on Wednesday, etc. I'll plan on a short 7.5 or 8 miler next weekend, and if all goes well, will be back working toward increasing my mileage more gradually after that. The biggest shift will be largely abandoning the speed workouts for now. 

I'm going to just live with being a bit slow for a while, especially since I need to gradually increase my mileage for my planned major race target in May of next year: the Flying Pig's Skyline 3-Way Challenge. The challenge is to run the 10k and 5k on the Saturday of the running festival in Cincinnati, and then either the half or full marathon the next day. I'm going to do the half, obviously, but that will still be a bit over 22 miles of running in less than 24 hours, so my winter will be spent getting my endurance up to the point where I can aim for fast (for me!) times in all three races. I don't want to just survive those races; I'd like to tackle them in good shape. 

All of which is to say, navigating this niggling injury such that it doesn't become a more significant challenge to my running in the short term is key. I think taking the week was the right thing to do for sure; now I just have to stick to the gradual increase in training to make sure I avoid any setbacks. 

Doubt vs. Confidence

For me, as I ramp up my mileage and try to become a slightly faster runner, the self-doubt that creeps in whenever we do something new becomes more pronounced, second only to the physical stress required to get better. We become accustomed to seeing others do something incredible like run a marathon or an ultramarathon, and thinking, "I could never do that!". Which is a normal response, I think, to some extent. Disbelief is part of wonder in some ways. If we believed anyone could run 100 miles, it wouldn't evoke so much wonder and admiration when we see men and women do it.

But I think it's when that thought crystallizes into what we think is knowledge that it becomes doubt. We go from exclaiming, "I could never do that" to "I could never do that! I'm too lazy/overweight/busy/ etc." And then we start believing that. I know I'm definitely guilty of this and it's probably going to be a much bigger part of my training and running experience as I move past the 10 mile mark in my long runs.

For example, last week I kept having nagging doubts going into my long run. What if I can't run the whole distance? What if I run too fast and flame out? Etc. I think that definitely impacted my run to some degree, as it was overall OK, but not what I was hoping. I ran too slowly, my stomach felt bad through much of the run, and I just didn't feel confident.

And that's the interesting part: confidence and doubt are two sides of the same coin, yet you can definitely have too much or too little of each. Overconfidence can prove as costly as being too doubtful of your abilities. Yet doubt in many ways is fuel for our desire to test ourselves and our capabilities, both physical and mental. I don't know if I will be able to run a marathon someday, but I'm fairly confident with the right training I can. So I'll go do it. I doubt I could ever run an ultramarathon, but I'll go attempt that someday as well.

Doubt asks the question, "You think you can do this?"

Confidence helps us answer, "Yes. Here, let me show you."

Of course reaching that point mentally isn't quite as easy as typing it out, but that's the point and it's definitely a critical part of training for long distance running. Certainly you have to have the strength of body to run 26.2 miles or 50km or 100 miles. But you also have to be able to face those doubts and use confidence akido to turn them to your advantage.

This weekend, I'm using my long run to try and work on this confidence/doubt balance, in addition to better fueling and a slightly faster pace.

Running to Live Longer, Not Necessarily Faster

The primary reason I run is because I enjoy the challenge (pushing to go farther and/or faster), and I find it's relaxing and enjoyable. But a big secondary reason I run is because it makes me feel better and because as I get older, I want to be healthier.

When I was young, like many of us, I didn't really have to do much to stay trim and feeling good. That's the blessing of youth. The curse is of course not being self-aware enough to truly enjoy it! But now, about a decade out from college, my metabolism has slowed ever so slightly and I can't eat ramen and pizza 7 days a week and not have it show up in my cholesterol and blood pressure numbers.

In fact, a slowly growing waist size was my impetus for starting to run back in 2007, although I luckily found that I really liked running, even though it hurt and is tough going. And gaining like 15 pounds last year gave me the kick in the pants I needed to get back to running in 2016, which has helped me rediscover why I really loved the sport to begin with.

So in the shorter term, my health goals for running are more weight based.But longer term, staying active and establishing lifelong habits like running I think will help me, quite honestly, keep ticking along for a longer time. Studies, like a comprehensive one done in Denmark (link to NYT Well blog posting about this, which contains a link to the actual study) and the results of which were published last year, bear that out. That study found that people who jogged at a moderate or slow pace for 1 to ~2.5 hours per week tended to have

Back! And (Arguably) Better Than Ever

What, a four-year gap between posts is like nothing! Cosmically or geologically speaking, it's barely a tenth of a second, really.

OK, so yeah, resurrecting this blog after a presidential term seems random, but it's truly not. Back in 2012, I'd been running for a while off and on, but consistency was a big problem and so I never really got back to the constant, scheduled running I enjoyed back in 2007-2009, to be honest. Without consistent running, there was little reason for me to consistently write, and so naturally the decline of one led to the decline of the other.

But, a lot has changed in the intervening 4 years. First, we moved from our crappy, small one-bedroom apartment with rodent problems in a busy, urban neighborhood with no parking. We bought a house, still in Baltimore City, but in a less busy, MUCH quieter part of town. It's got three floors, three bedrooms, and plenty of space for us. Plus, we pay $300 more per month for 3x the space and something we own outright. For us, that was huge and our rowhouse truly feels like home. Plus the house came with all-new everything from the studs up to the furnace and roof and two-level(!) deck. Plus a parking pad which, if you live in a city, you know is a life changer.

Second, I got a bit fatter, which actually was not a positive change in itself, but did provide the motivation to return to running with renewed commitment. Before moving,

Motivation Along the Timeline

Running, like most sports or any activity that requires a great deal of practice, also requires a great deal of commitment and discipline in order to do it well. Although each person has their own goal for where they want to take their running/kayaking/writing, etc. For some, the goal is to finish a 5K; others want to complete 10 ultra marathons. There's certainly no single achievement that every runner must reach to consider themselves accomplished.

But I would venture to say that every runner who sticks with the sport at any level, must possess something inside, some drive or personal reason for continuing to get out there and run 3 miles every morning or 120 miles every week. Of course whatever that fire might be is different for each runner, but I think at some point, we all have some basic desire that gets up and out the door.

That's what I took away from the article in the Sunday New York Times about Ryan Hall and his close linking of running with his Christian beliefs. Without getting into a discussion on religion, I'll just say I'm not particularly religious, although I was raised in the Episcopalian Church and have both an interest and respect for religion and those who are ardent believers/practitioners.

So, I found Sunday's article interesting because it discusses both Hall's personal beliefs when it comes to running and faith, and addresses a key area of recreational running that I thin often goes overlooked: motivation. Everyone is motivated to voluntarily go run around a few miles several times a week. But the actual substance of that motivation varies widely.

I guess for me, my motivation can be broken into two parts: short-term and long-term. Short-term (i.e. over the next six months to one year) I want to just feel better, fitter than I was walking out of the CFA exam a month ago. I want to get back to the point where I can run a half marathon. I felt better, physically and mentally, when I was running upwards of 15 mile long runs.

Longer term, I guess you could say my motivation is to extend the longer term. While 30 (my current age) isn't old by really any modern definition (although in the 12th century in Europe, I'd be well along towards late middle age, but that's another entry for another day), I know that eventually, things will slow down and what seems easy now won't seem so easy in maybe 10 or 15 years, much less further down the line. So, I want to get into healthy habits now, so when I'm 60 or, ideally, 90(!) I won't feel or act my age. I'm not really afraid of aging, per se, but of the amplification of the effects of aging when one doesn't establish healthy habits earlier in life. Running is one part of that, of course, but healthier eating, sleeping and mental outlook are also big parts over the longer term.

I guess I'd also add a medium term motivation, although it's more of a goal. Medium term, to me, means around five years out, just to be specific. I watched the Ironman World Championships this weekend on NBC; it's one of my favorite sporting events to watch, even if it's not live and it's edited, etc. I like that they profile both the pros and age groupers competing in the event. It's inspiring to see, for example, a guy who lost both legs in an accident complete the course, or a woman who used to weigh over 300 pounds but lost nearly half that, become an Ironman (Ironwoman? Ironperson?). It's also insane to watch the pros do the 2.4 mile swim, 112 mile bike ride and then top it all off with a 26.2 marathon in the Hawaiian heat. And do it in under 8 hours. Just crazy to me.

Got a hankering for some Ironman clips? Here's a link to the Ironman YouTube channel.

But every time I watch it, I find myself saying, that would be cool to do. So I'd like to build toward that goal, although it'll take some time. Firstly, I don't own a road bike, nor do I have easy access to a pool, so a big part of the training remains out of my reach at this point. But also, until further notice, every six months I start a new training program of sorts with the CFA exam. By the time April and May roll around, I'm spending as much time studying per day as I would training for an Ironman. Doing both, for me, at least, is unreasonable.

So, until those small, tiny details are resolved, I'll focus on building up my mileage base and getting consistent in getting out the door or to the gym. And I've promised myself that when I get done with the CFA program, I'm buying myself a road bike. So there's some more motivation!